Tyranny, Time and Trust

Carole Towriss Writing 4 Comments

Sand flowing through an hourglass on black background concept for time running out

So it’s 9:53 pm and I’m writing tomorrow’s blog post.

I procrastinate. A lot.

Or maybe I just have four children. Everything that is not bleeding, hungry, crying, yelling, or broken gets pushed to the bottom of the list, and a blog post tends to be very quiet. Invisible, even.

Until I realize it’s Thursday night and something needs to be up in a couple hours.

“Schedule your time,” they say. Writers need to block out large chunks of time to write, rewrite, research, market, publicize … it would take all my time to do it right, and I only have a few hours a day. Once the kids come home from school, quiet time is over, and I am no longer in control.

Striking a balance is nearly impossible. I never get it right. One week I spend too much time writing, and the next I can’t manage to get a single word on the page.

Maybe I’m just not disciplined enough. Between my husband, his business, our kids, my work at church, a house to keep up … I just haven’t figured out how to squeeze it all in and keep the proper proportions. I fall prey to the tyranny of the urgent, and don’t always recognize what is most important or essential.

I have a couple weaknesses that don’t help. I’m not so good at delegating. I’m a major introvert, which means anything that involves working with someone (other than my family) gets puts off as long as possible. I detest talking on the phone. If I can’t do it online or by email, it will get delayed until the last possible second while I try to figure out how to avoid that phone call.

The good part about this is that most of the time, I realize that everyone else around me is in the same boat. We’re all just doing the best we can. I tend to cut people a little more slack these days. Maybe that’s just a function of growing older, but I think it’s also because I see in others the same battle I face every day. So I try to smile and grant them a moment’s peace. Because if their days are like some of mine, it may be the only one they get that day.

It doesn’t balance out within a week very often, but maybe in the end it all balances out. I can only take each day as it comes. God is the only one who can bring anything to fruition, so the only sensible thing to do is trust in Him.

Proverbs 16:3


Comments 4

  1. You are way ahead of me–you are PUBLISHED! My procrastination list not only includes my family responsibilities, but also working outside of the home 36 hours/week, 12 hour shifts translating to everything else needing done on my days off…you get the picture. Additionally, I am a social animal. I have activities besides just family things and have a hard time dissociating from long-time relationships. Writing is truly an isolationist activity. I have pretty much given up on that aspect of my life; but I still enjoy reading and encouraging new writers!

  2. Hi Carole: I learned of you through a loop entry in which ‘Faith, Friends and Chocolate’ website is mentioned. I’m so glad that I have begun to read about the authors involved in this venture. This is my first experience of reading your words. Your heartfelt message is beautiful and abounds in hope and understanding. I look forward to receiving your blog and news notices. Take care. Mary

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