The High Cost of Unforgiveness

Carole TowrissInternational Adoption, Uncategorized Leave a Comment

Executive Order 9066, posted February 19, 1942

We visited the Smithsonian’s Museum of American History a few months ago. It happened to be the 60th anniversary of America’s decision to place Japanese-Americans in internment camps during World War II. There was a large board standing near the entrance to the exhibit with 5×7 posit-it notes and Sharpies nearby, inviting guests to share their thoughts on the decision. Most were somewhere between “I can’t believe we did this, what a terrible move,” and “Well, hindsight is 20/20, we did the best we could at the time.”

One note on bright, lime green paper stuck out. It said this action probably saved our country “from spies from within.” I was shocked. Who could possibly still defend that decision all these years later?

Then I remembered a relative of my husband. He fought in World War II and to this day hates all Asians, because the “Japs” killed all his buddies. I realize war is beyond brutal, and I can’t begin to imagine the psychological scars it can inflict. But reason must still temper emotion and control our actions.

my Kazakh girls

When we first took MC to his house after bringing her home from Kazakhstan, he left the room. and didn’t come back. His grown son followed him. She’s not Japanese, or even Chinese or Korean, or any kind of Asian that could be remotely associated with the war. In fact, she comes from a country that didn’t even exist until 1991.Why take it out on her? True, she was three months old and had no idea he was snubbing her, but it hurt me.

I don’t understand holding a grudge that long. It must take a tremendous amount of work. But we all do it. Not generally for an entire race of people, or even a country, but holding on to unforgiveness for even one person depletes energy.

It’s a good idea, and one I need to employ far more often than I do, to ask God to show you if you’re harboring any unforgiveness toward someone. Like as not, that person either is not aware of your feelings or just doesn’t care, so the only one being harmed is you. And what good does that do?

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